A few days before we celebrated Jesse’s first birthday with our family and friends at his party, we spent his actual birthday together as a little family.
Amongst the routine of meals and bath time we opened presents, played together and enjoyed a picnic in the warm sunshine.
It was a perfect day.
On the verge of walking, talking and world domination. Here is Jesse’s 11 months milestones video.
Enjoy.
Two days ago, our little guy turned one! Can you believe that? One! Jesse has officially been part of our lives for a whole year. Where has all that time gone?!
Today we celebrated this wonderful milestone with our closest family and friends at Jesse’s first birthday party.
All the festivities has me reminiscing about our amazing journey into parenthood. From right back to when we first kicked off trying to conceive, to falling pregnant, Jesse’s arrival into the world and those first few days and weeks as new parents. It all still seems so clear in my mind.
So following Renee’s last blog post, I thought I’d give my perspective on Jesse’s birth story. Because let’s face it, how many birth stories have you read from the perspective of the dad?
The last weeks – The calm before the storm
I was loving the fact that I had access to a permanent designated driver ever since we had found out that Renee was pregnant. It was just a shame I didn’t take advantage of this fact more often.
In all seriousness though, in those last weeks of Renee’s pregnancy, we were both starting to get very excited about meeting our little bundle of joy. But it wasn’t just excitement that was starting to build inside me. It was a mixture of emotions that included excitement, nervousness, joy, panic, elation, fear… you get the picture. I was excited but freaking out at the same time about becoming a first time dad.
Renee and I would constantly talk about the impending labour. We spoke about the birth plan, when I should start my parental leave, what kind of labour we thought Renee might experience and when the baby would finally decide it was time to greet the world.
In those last few weeks I constantly joked that I didn’t mind when the baby was born, just as long as it wasn’t born on State of Origin night. And if it was, well there better be a TV in the birthing suite, because I was not going to miss Game 1!
On the weekend of the 23/24 May 2015, Renee and I agreed that I should start my leave earlier than I had initially planned. While the plan was to work right up to when Renee was in labour, I started my leave on Monday, 25 May 2015, so we could enjoy some time together before the baby came.
The day before
We didn’t have much planned for the day. A casual stroll around the shops (or “the mall” depending on where you’re reading from) was the most exciting thing we had planned for the day. Mostly because we wanted to keep things as relaxed as possible to not put any undue stress on Renee.
After walking around for about an hour, Renee looks at me and tells me that she thinks she’s been having mild contractions the whole time we’ve been at the shops.
“What?! Really?! Do we need to go to the hospital?! Your water isn’t going to break in the middle of the shopping centre is it?!”
I have a slight tendency to overreact to certain situations sometimes. So after Renee assures me that it’s nothing too serious and that perhaps we just head home, I calm down we head off.
For the rest of the day, Renee kept me updated on how she was feeling, how intense the contractions were, how far apart they were and whether she needed me to do anything for her. There didn’t seem to be any consistency to the contractions with regards to how far apart they were, although they were getting more intense.
Later that night at around 11pm, as Renee was leaning up against the kitchen bench to help get her through each contraction, I asked again if we should tell anybody or ring ahead to the hospital. But again I got reassurance from Renee that we don’t need to ring through to anyone just yet, as for all we knew the contractions could stop. Plus, our midwife had told us to stay at home until the contractions were 3 minutes apart, which they weren’t.
So on Renee’s approval, it was off to bed for me to get some sleep, just in case things ramped up during the night.
D-Day
Renee gave me an update over breakfast about her night and how she was presently feeling and as she suspected, throughout the night, the contractions eventually began to get lighter and further apart until they faded away almost entirely. Regardless, we had a midwife appointment at 10:30am, so we could talk through what had happened with a professional soon enough.
I remember however that despite how calm things appeared on the surface, I was still a little anxious underneath it all, as all signs were starting to point to this baby making an appearance sometime in the next few days… if not earlier. And so while at the midwife appointment, I again make the joke that the baby better not come tonight because I really want to watch Game 1 of State of Origin. We all have a bit of a chuckle. We then head to Renee’s parents for a quick visit.
We barely last an hour there before Renee ends up bent back over the kitchen bench as the waves of pain from contractions start again. Renee’s mum looks both excited but supportive as she comforts her through each contraction. Not long after the contractions start again, Renee gives me the nod that she wants to head back home to ride them out.
I leave Renee at home (again, with her permission) to grab some lunch. When I get back, I find Renee doing what could be described as some sort of squatting manoeuvre beside the bed and in what appears to be a world of pain. Even I can tell that this time, it looks like it’s all systems go. Time to call the hospital!
Again, excitement, nervousness, joy, panic, elation, fear all washes over me and I feel my legs start to shake as I start to freak out. Wow… This is actually happening… Right now… This… Is… Happening… Right now… I must hide it well though, because it appears as though Renee doesn’t seem to notice my wave of emotions. Although, given the state she’s in, I can hardly blame her for taking notice of anything else other than the pain she was experiencing.
And while all this is happening, in the back of my mind I can’t help but think, “dammit… all that joking around about how I didn’t want the baby to come on State of Origin night, and now it’s happening!!!”
So I get all the bags we prepared for the birth together and start packing the car. I hit schedule TV to record State of Origin Game 1, just in case we do end up missing it (priorities right) and we head to the hospital.
The drive to the hospital was probably one of the longest drives we’ve ever had to take. I was a nervous ball of energy. Renee was in tears because of the pain she was experiencing with each contraction. And all I wished was that we could somehow teleport right to the doorstep of the hospital.
We make it. But the battle is far from over. I pile myself up with all our bags and help Renee out of the car. But it’s even a slow journey up to the maternity ward with Renee having to stop every few minutes to ride out yet another contraction. We make it to the maternity ward counter and our midwife team is called. Renee gets down on her haunches while holding onto the counter for another contraction when one of the midwives appear and says “Wow, looks like you ready to go then. Follow me.”
In the birthing suite
My first job was to call Sharon and Lia (Renee’s mum and sister) to ask them to come straight to the hospital as Renee wanted them both there for the birth. From that moment on my sole responsibility was making sure I helped Renee as much as possible and whenever she needed it.
And like that it was on… like Donkey Kong!
It was such an intense experience. I often felt a little helpless, as I watched Renee have to push through waves of pain as each contraction got more and more painful. I got her water when she needed it. I helped her move around the room when she needed. I let her squeeze my hands so hard at times that it felt like she was about to break my fingers off. Actually, at one point her mum took over the hand holding and I think Renee did cause her some finger damage!
But I wasn’t going to complain about a single thing, because I knew I’d probably get a slap to the face.
The most annoying thing for me however, was the fact that I must have either been nervous or I drank too much water heading into the birthing suite, because I remember having to go to the toilet nearly every 20 mins. It was quite inconvenient, but whenever I did need to go, Sharon and Lia were there to continue to help Renee through the pain.
I couldn’t believe how well Renee was coping with labour. She wanted the birth to be as natural as it could be and with the exception of a little gas, she did it completely unassisted. And I don’t think I’ve ever told Renee this, but the midwife must have had more faith in Renee than she had in herself, because she turned the gas off well before Renee knew it was off.
And then, at 7:50pm, our beautiful boy was born. Wow… A wave of emotions flooded through me. There he was. A boy. So tiny. So beautiful. All 6lb 2oz of him. Renee caught him in her arms, brought him up to her chest and held him close as he took his first breaths. I nuzzled into them both. So proud of Renee for what she had just done. And so completely overwhelmed with what was now in front of me.
A little while after he was born, I had the pleasure of cutting the cord. And then not too long after that, I got to have my first cuddle of my new born son. Skin to skin. Just me and our baby boy. At that point, I remember thinking how tiny and delicate he was. I was so worried that I was going to break him.
When the midwife had left to complete some paperwork and Renee and I got some alone time with him together, we started thinking about what we should name him. We didn’t want to rush naming him if we didn’t feel the names we had picked suited him. But, as we did already have a few combinations picked out, we thought that now was a good opportunity to go through them.
Once we got to the name Jesse Jack Barton, we immediately knew this was the one. It fit perfectly. He even looked like a Jesse Jack Barton.
And so as if it was always meant to be, we both looked down at Jesse Jack Barton. Our first child. Our son. Our life.
Like Renee said, I’ll never forget the moment my life changed forever. The moment in that birthing suite where I met our beautiful baby boy for the first time. The moment I fell madly in love with our sweet little Jesse.
My dearest Jesse, happy birthday!
Happy birthday to the most amazing little dude we know!
We can hardly believe that you turn one today Jesse! You have brought so much joy and happiness to our lives, more than you will probably ever know.
We love being woken by you every morning. We love your cheekiness. We love your spirit. We love that you suffer from FOMO, even when you should be sleeping. We love how you put a smile on the face of everyone who meets you.
Today, is all about you darling.
Happy birthday Jesse. We love you…
We are just days away from our little boy’s first birthday and we can’t quite believe it. No longer a ‘baby’ and becoming more toddler-like with each day.
This special milestone has me reminiscing about his arrival into the world and those first few days as a first time mum.
So I thought I might commemorate the occasion by telling Jesse’s birth story. Partly because all mum’s love to share their labour stories and partly because all kids love to hear about their entrance into the world. But also because I don’t want the details to get fuzzy. I want to document it so I will always remember.
Those last few weeks of pregnancy
I was loving pregnancy but I was also starting to get very excited about meeting our new family member. And if I’m honest, a little anxious about the pain I was about to endure. I had heard lots of birth stories and was even blessed to witness a few bubs coming into the world, but I had no idea what my birth experience would be like.
I knew what I wanted; a calm yet active labour. To labour at home for as long as possible. To do it as naturally and unassisted as possible. But I also knew that a birth plan doesn’t always go to plan and should be flexible.
Kaine would ask me every day towards the end if there was “any movement at the station” before leaving for work and each time I would smile and assure him no, not yet.
On the 25th of May, Kaine decided to start his leave from work. Even if bub didn’t come for another week or more, we would have some special time together before bub did come.
We went for a walk with the dog that day (well I waddled) and I distinctly remember on our way back the man across the road asked how long we had to go. Ten days I answered excitedly. And two days later we were parents.
Tuesday 26th May, 2015
7am – I’m lying in bed enjoying one of the last few sleep ins I’ll have for probably a very long while and feel myself drifting in and out of sleep. I start to realise that it’s mild period-like pain waking me from my slumber. Without opening my eyes I sleepily wonder to myself if it’s the early stages of contractions. I ignore it for a while longer and continue to snooze.
Later that morning we are both awake as we had plans to go the shops. It’s not until after we are there for about an hour that I mention to Kaine that I think I’m getting mild contractions. Nothing to freak out about, but perhaps we should go home. By this stage they were feeling a bit stronger and all I could think about was not wanting my waters to break in public (clean up in isle 5!).
As the day got later, the contractions got stronger and more painful, but still very irregular. Some were 20 minutes apart while others were 4 or 5 minutes apart.
11 pm – Kaine asked (yet again) if we should tell anyone. I told him no because I knew these things could stop and start. The midwives had told us to stay at home until the contractions were 3 minutes apart so that’s what I was going to do. I instructed Kaine to go and get some sleep. But there was no way I could with the waves of pain I was getting.
So, with the lights dimmed I had my contraction timer app and a game on my phone for in between and every time a contraction came I would get up and squat whilst bracing against the kitchen bench.
Sometime during the early hours of Wednesday I migrated to the spare room to get some rest in between contractions. The gap was getting longer and the pain was getting milder. By 6am the next morning, they were all but gone! I had a midwife appointment at 10.30am, so I knew that I could fill her in with the nights activity and see what she says.
Wednesday 27th May, 2015
After barely any sleep I was feeling particularly spritely – must have been adrenaline kicking in.
10am – We head off to my midwife appointment. I explain the last 24 hours and she says that’s all great signs and this could go on for a week. What now? A week?? Hell no. I have a couple of little pains in her office but nothing to really worry about.
Afterwards we drop by mum’s for a visit as she is right around the corner. Now she knows nothing of what’s been going on until I rush to the kitchen bench to resume my squat position. Conversation stops and breathing gets heavier. I see the look of glee on mum’s face which at the time, seems kind of cruel. After two more I say to Kaine for the second day in a row, “I think we need to go home now”.
12.30pm – We arrive home and while Kaine goes to get lunch I hop into bed with the lap top to continue watching Glee on Netflix which has been my guilty pleasure since starting my maternity leave.
I soon find myself hovering by the bed in a world of pain. I recommence timing contractions and they’re getting closer. It’s time to call the hospital.
The midwife answers and I can hardly talk I’m in so much pain. I manage to form enough words to tell her what’s happening and she tells us to come in.
Holy sh*t! This is happening! We grab our bags, I warm my heat pack one more time and we head out the door.
That car trip is not one I’ll forget anytime soon. I can’t squat my way through contractions in the car and instead have to sit up right. I clench the seat beside me. I start to cry. Partly from the pain and partly because I’m scared.
I have a contraction in the car park and two more getting up to the maternity ward.
2 pm – They hook me up to a machine to listen to bubby’s heartbeat and to monitor contractions. For the next 30 minutes, they just stand around and watch me ryth pain with each one. After deciding that I am indeed in labour they check to see how dilated I am and whether or not they can break my waters.
I was so happy to hear I was 4cm dilated (all that work last night paid off!) and breaking my waters was surprisingly easy and pain free.
Well, from that moment, it was game on! We put the call in to my parents as we had agreed that my mum and sister would join us in the birth suite. They were both unbelievable support as was Kaine.
And I was lucky enough to be able to stick to my birth plan entirely. I remained mobile throughout the whole labour and stayed off the bed pretty much the whole time. It was definitely leg day as I continued to squat with each contraction. Boy did I feel that the next day!
But it was part of my routine. I coped by doing the same thing every time. At one point the midwife suggested I count or get Kaine to count during each one. I remember thinking “if you start to count out loud and I will slap you!”
When it came time to push I thought nature would just take over. But I found that I really had to deliberately switch gears from riding through the wave of contractions to using it to bear down. I was getting to the stage where I didn’t know how much more I could do or how much longer I could go for.
When I said that the midwife replied that they wouldn’t let me push for much longer. Immediately I wondered what that meant. Assisted delivery? Caesarean? Okay, time to get this baby out!
I realised what was holding me back was my fear of tearing after hearing one particular horror story. I just had to put that aside and breath this baby out. And that’s exactly what I did.
7.50 pm – It’s finally over. The sweet relief of no more pain washes over me as does the love for the tiny baby I hold in my arms. “Well what is it?” I hear everyone say and I realise I haven’t yet looked to see whether I’m holding my son or my daughter. And nobody else in the room knows either.
It’s a boy I say as I look up at Kaine. We both smile as we look back down at our beautiful baby boy.
My dad, who was not-so-patiently waiting in the waiting room this whole time, joins us while we all marvel at our beautiful baby boy. Around that time, we all put in our final guesses for baby’s weight. He was a delicate parcel of 6 pound 2 ounces. I think Kaine might have guessed his weight exactly.
I was just completely in new mum bliss mode now. Thrilled to have had such an amazing birth experience but also thrilled it was over. Just in time for my next challenge. Motherhood.
I’ll never forget the moment my life changed forever. The moment I fell even more madly in love with my husband and the moment my heart started to live outside my body.
Jesse, my darling boy, happy birthday.
We can’t believe it has now been two years since our epic Euro adventure.
This day in 2014 saw us tick a massive item off our bucket list – seeing the Eiffel Tour. We also ate snails, visited the Sacre Coeur and the iconic Moulin Rouge. It was the first real opportunity to sight see on the trip as the first few days were taken up mostly with being on planes, trains or automobiles.
Writing regular blog posts can be a hard ask. Especially when you set yourself a task to publish 3 a week. And while we haven’t hit that mark every week we have, for the most part, done pretty well.
So when thinking about what I could write about for my post today, I really had to get my thinking cap on to come up with something interesting.
But… after catching myself in the act yet again, I found the perfect subject for today’s post. And not only that, I feel like today’s post is about a subject that a lot of people out there (if not everyone) might not just relate to, but get a bit of a laugh out of it.
So what in the hell is this long introduction leading up to? Well… as you may have already guessed by the title, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) of course.
As a quick side note, please let me state up front that I know OCD can be a serious and debilitating condition. This post is in no way intended to undermine that fact, and is also not intended to cause offence or stress to those who do genuinely suffer from this condition.
With that said, let’s face it, us humans are a funny species. We all have our little quirks and idiosyncrasies and quite often, they allow us every now and again to laugh at each other, laugh at ourselves and laugh at the strange things we do.
And I am no exception.
I think that almost everyone out there, has a little OCD in them. What might start out as making sure the blinds on all the office windows are level can sometimes turn into where you can’t have the volume in your car on an odd number. Oh, and yes, I know about these quirks because they both relate to me.
But we all have our little quirks, don’t we. So I figured hey, why not share mine for a laugh. Maybe someone else out there can relate and maybe this post will make them feel like less of a weirdo. Because at the end of the day, you’re not a weirdo. You are pretty much exactly the same as the rest of us.
So what are my bad OCD habits? Well, here are the ones that I catch myself doing on a regular basis:
The blinds in the office
When I mentioned the blinds in the office, I wasn’t kidding. This is exactly one of my OCD things that annoys the absolute piss out of me. If you have horizontal blinds in the office, whether you have them raised or lowered, they all MUST be falling at the same height.
If they are not, then you can be guaranteed that I’ll get up and fix this abomination.
And to those in the office who change the heights just to f*** with me, you will feel my wrath! The wrath of a man who is enraged with ‘inconsistent horizontal blind height anger’. Don’t worry, it’s a real thing… I promise!
The volume level on devices that use numbers
Yup, again, like I said earlier, one of my things is the volume level. That said, I think this one may be more common than I think. But when turning the volume up or down on any device from the car radio to the TV, it has to be set to an even number, or in fives. That’s right. It can’t be set at any number that ends in a 1, 3, 7 or 9.
Want the volume set to 22. No worries.
What about 14. Yup, good as gold mate.
35. Perfect. No issues here.
19… OH HELL NO!!! You better change that to 20 or 18 quick smart or I’m going to lose my sh*t!
Brushing my teeth
Now this one I feel is going to be odd to many out there. But when I brush my teeth, I have to brush each section the same number of times.
I don’t know why… I don’t know how it started… All I know is, if I brush my back left molars 8 times and then accidentally brush my back right molars 9 times… bugger… It’s back to square one.
Let me clarify, I usually don’t count the strokes per se, but I do hum the same tune for each section of my teeth that I brush. It’s the same thing right?
Clean floors
Ok. So I can admit that my level of OCD’ness has somewhat diminished when it comes to clean floors since Jesse came along. But it’s still there, and dirty floors still annoy me.
In the past, I could not stand dirty floors. If I was walking through the house and I felt even the tiniest speck of dirt then look out. The brooms were activated. The vacuum was out. The mops were loaded. And the floor would be buffed to perfection.
Since Jesse has come into our lives, our floor is in a constant state of uncleanliness that I have had to learn to respect. It is near impossible to keep your floors clean when you have an 11 month old baby crawling around the house. And then there’s dinner time… Ahh dinner time… The once civilised activity where we used to eat our meals has turned into what Jesse thinks is a fun game of ‘let’s throw every little skerrick of food to floor for no other reason than I just don’t want it on the table in front of me.
I am lucky I have come to terms with my dirty floors, because the old me would have thrown the brooms and mops in the air and shouted “F*** THIS SH*T… I’M OUT!”
Morning routine
Ok… Now I know this one isn’t strange, but it still shows that little part of my that is OCD.
Every morning when I get up for work, I do everything in the exact same order. That’s right, I have a morning routine and I stick to it every… single… day… (Well, work days that is).
I can recite my whole routine and can guarantee that each morning, I do not break it. It goes like this: Wake up, toilet, eat breakfast, take vitamins, brush teeth, wash face, put deodorant on, put pants on, put socks and shoes on, do hair, put singlet and shirt on, belt on, aftershave on, watch on, pack lunch, pack bag, leave.
Now not everyone will be that OCD with their morning routine. But I’m not ashamed by it at all. In fact, I’ve read a couple of articles that suggest having a morning routing that you stick to like the one I have is actually beneficial, as it frees your mind to think about other things you need to accomplish rather than thinking about what you need to do as your getting ready. So the jokes on you… you who doesn’t have a morning routine.
Anyways… So that’s about it… Those are my (or some of my) idiosyncrasies that I have a laugh about with others every now and again. Like I said, we all have them, so why not just have a laugh and accept the fact that we do all have a little OCD in us.
So with that I ask you… What about you? What are your OCD quirks? What do you do that you think is strange but in actual fact might be quite common?
Let’s share and all have a laugh together about the fact that we all, are a little bit weird!
One of the things we love about living in Brisbane (there are many) is that it is practically summer all year round. We are starting to see some cooler mornings and evenings but the days are still beautifully warm and sunny.
This week we ventured outdoors a few times to soak up a bit of of Vitamin D and enjoy play time outside.
It’s a special day in the NSSLOU household today.
“So what’s so special about today?” I hear you ask.
Well, today just so happens to be Renee’s birthday. That’s right… The old wifey for lifey is one more year older today. Which also makes her one more year wiser. And when we think back on what’s happened over the last year… wow.
Renee, or ‘Mummy’ as she has now become affectionately known as throughout our household, is one amazing woman. And without her, everything would well and truly be falling apart!
Renee is very much the pillar of our household. Largely due the fact that she has taken on the very big and important responsibility of being a full-time stay-at-home mum to our beautiful boy, Jesse. BUT… Not being content with just being a full-time mum, Renee has also started and is currently building her Kangatraining business on the side. And while being a Kanga Trainer has it’s perks (like being able to take bubby to work), it adds to the already overflowing plate that is Renee’s daily schedule.
But while there certainly are exhausting days here and there, for the most part, you very rarely hear even a single complaint about it. Why? Because like I said, she is amazing!
Renee continues to surprise me with everything she does and everything she takes on. I am forever thankful and lucky to have her in my life. As is Jesse.
Now, as the sun sets on today’s festivities, I cannot wait to celebrate many more birthdays in the years to come with one of my favourite people in the whole wide world. I can’t wait to share more laughs and more fun with you. I can’t wait to grow our family even more with you. I can’t wait to travel with you and experience more and more new things with you. I can’t wait to grow old with you.
But for now, let me just say this…
Happy Birthday babe!
You are amazing and you deserve all the happiness in the world!
All our love,
Kaine and Jesse.
To all the wonderful Mothers out there, Happy Mother’s Day from us at NSSLOU.
We hope that you all have a wonderful day, because there is one thing that we know for certain, you deserve it!
not so secret life of us 