Babies grow and change so quickly and ours is no exception.
So we decided it might be fun to record a video each month to create a snapshot in time that we can look back on in the future.
An opportunity to capture the milestones he reached that month, funny stories, his likes and dislikes and our thoughts and feelings as parents at each stage.
This is the first instalment.
Every year in the last week of August you will find us getting our country on at the Gympie Music Muster. We have been going for over 10 years and it is definitely one of the highlights of our calendar.
This year however was a little different to most. This year we had our 3 month old baby with us.
Yes, call us crazy, but we took Bub on his first camping trip, 5 nights in the Amamoor State Forest with 50,000 of our closest friends.
And he handled it like a champ!
What I thought was going to be an agonising car trip turned out to be a breeze. He slept the whole way there and back. And the little guy took to camping like a pro. Thunderstorm and all.
We must say a big thank you to our awesome friends for being so understanding of our situation and for helping to make our time so enjoyable. It was incredibly reassuring to hear how happy they were that we didn’t back out because we had a baby and that it in no way negatively affected their time (no one really gets much sleep at Muster anyway).
Obviously he is our number one priority and we made all the necessary adjustments to ensure he was safe and comfortable. But it was also great to prove that we can still do the things we love even though we are parents now.
Last Sunday night was another rough night for Renee as far as sleep goes.
Unfortunately for us (although I’m sure Jesse loved it), our little man had a massive sleep that afternoon while we were at a family BBQ. This meant that when it came time for us to get some sleep, he was any combination of wide awake; restless; feeding; smiling; crying.
This made for a very frustrating start to what I expected to be a long night ahead for Renee.
We have a system for night times which seems to work for us most of the time. That system involves Renee getting up throughout the night to tend to Jesse (she does have the boobs after all) so that I can get a good night sleep for work the next day, and me tending to Jesse (again, when he’s not hungry and wanting to feed on account of having no boobs) when I get home and on the weekends.
This does mean however, as you would have read in Renee’s last blog post, that she hasn’t had a full nights sleep since Jesse was born.
I know she had a rough night on that Sunday night, and the next day I really wanted to let her know that she could call on me if she was at wits end and just needed a break or some sleep.
At around 10 am on Monday morning, I sent the following text message:
“Hey babe. So are you sure you’re ok today?
I just really want to stress to you that while I do appreciate how you want to make sure I get enough sleep for work, I would rather be sleepy at work for a day than have you up losing your shit at night with Jesse.
I think you’re an absolute star and a super mum, but if you’re struggling and at wits end, I am here. I WANT to help. You don’t have to do it all by yourself. That’s my role and responsibility as a dad!
Love you.”
I received a text message back minutes later telling how much just some simple words like that really meant. She went on further to say:
“You are such a great dad. In fact, everyone says what a great dad you are. I dont often get told that I am doing a good job so thank you for saying that.”
So I am here today, writing this down, to tell you that you are not just doing a good job… you are doing a phenomenal job as a new mum to our little Jesse.
I know you don’t hear it enough. From me or from others. And for that I am sorry.
But I am here, now, telling you that to me, you are Superwoman! And I promise to remember to tell you more often, just how good of a job you are doing!
You are our super mum!
When you become a parent, in particular a mum, you become incredibly aware of sleep.
You are either doing it, wishing you were doing it, thinking about doing it or talking about doing it.
Everything is now being weighed up against sleep.
Housework or sleep?
Exercise or sleep?
Sex or sleep?
Sleep will usually trump just about everything else. But often you just want to get some things done or simply enjoy a few minutes to yourself to just lie on the couch and stare stupidly into space (there’s not enough brain power to read all those books I thought I’d catch up on during my maternity leave!).
Watching your baby sleep is both delightful and frustrating. It’s 7.30 pm and he is sleeping. I should really go to bed too. But then BAM… suddenly it’s 9 pm and he’s awake and hungry. Or worse, happy and wanting to play! Damn it, was it really worth staying awake to watch some crappy TV show or do the dishes? I could have had an hours’ sleep!
I’ve now gone 3 months without a solid nights sleep. And I definitely underestimated the concept of sleep deprivation. The last night I slept through was the 25th May. And had I have known it would be my last I would have taken notice and really took pleasure in it.
But that is just life with a baby right. I always knew that would be the case. I’ve missed the odd night of sleep due to a big night of partying and I survived that fine. This will be a piece of cake. No ‘job’ to get up for so I’ll just go with the flow and sleep when I can…
Well that’s all well and good in theory but I’ve come to realise it is really f#*%ing annoying to be woken up 3 times a night, our bodies are not built to do that. And you go through your days with a foggy brain which only gets worse. Some days I really wonder if I should be operating a vehicle!
Other people are now suddenly obsessed with mine and my babies sleep habits too. Any conversation usually includes “so is he a good sleeper?”
My answer is always yes. But what does that even mean? I say yes because at least I’m getting some sleep. Two hour blocks has now increased to 3-4 hour blocks most nights. And when I get 5 in a row I feel like a new woman!
Then comes the obsession with the elusive ‘sleeping through’ phenomenon. When is my baby going to do it? Her baby is two months younger and is already doing it. Am I ever going to sleep like a normal person (aka my husband) again?
For the most part of the last 3 months we have co-slept. Not something I thought I would do but worked for us and has kept us sane. But I’m now ready to reclaim our bed and sleep comfortably again.
Jesse is not a fan of the bassinet so it looks as though we are going to attempt to move him straight to his cot in his own room. Eek!
Wish us luck!
What are your tips for getting baby to sleep on their own or moving to their cot?
One of the most thrilling parts of having a new baby is watching them grow, learn and discover.
Mr Jesse has recently discovered his fist….well the left one at least. Several times a day when his hand passes his face he gets fixated on it for minutes. Staring and studying it with immense fascination.
It is such a joy to watch him discovering his body and the world around him. We look forward to seeing him learn to roll, sit up and all the other precious milestones that are no doubt just around the corner.
What are your favourite milestones to watch your baby achieving?
It is done. You are officially twelve weeks old. And it has been swell, my love.
After nine beautiful months, three trimesters, of growing you in my belly every day wondering what you would be like. We have now spent the fourth trimester, your first three months in the outside world, falling in love. And I for one am smitten.
You are the sweetest little boy. I will cherish this special time we’ve had together forever. Our secret rendezvous in the middle of the night. Our delicious afternoon naps together. Carrying you close to my body making us both reminisce about those months you spent inside. And our morning snuggles in bed, my heart melting with every smile.
You have already grown so much. From a tiny, slippery bundle I could hold in my two palms to a chubby bouncing boy. The tiniest clothes were too big for you and now you are filling out your 000 outfits.
When I felt you kicking in my tummy I knew we had a special connection. When I held you for the first time I knew I loved you. But now that I know you I know that my heart now lives outside my body. When you are sad and cry my heart aches like never before. And when you smile it sings.
These past 3 months haven’t been easy have they, my love. We have had some tough times together. I know you love it out here with us but it has been hard transitioning from the warm and cosy home in my tummy and sometimes you miss it. I miss it too.
Remember our second day together? You were so hungry and we were both learning what to do. We cried together that night in hospital but we made it through.
I can’t promise that there won’t be more hard times ahead. But I can promise that we’ll be together so we’ll be alright.
My precious boy, thank you for choosing me to be your Mummy.
I love you.
We are waiting with bated breath to hear the delightful sound of Jesse’s first laugh.
He often shrieks with joy as he smiles and kicks his legs. And there have been a few times when he has smiled and had a little chuckle in his sleep but he is yet to let out a definite baby giggle.
Today’s Photo Friday is a cute video of our smiley bubba.
Before having a baby I had heard parents complain about how difficult it was and how long it took to leave the house with a baby. And yes, now I know what they were talking about.
Before baby, husband and I could be out the door within a few minutes of making the decision.
“Want to go out for lunch?”
“Sure!”
Freshen up, grab keys, wallet and phone and out the door we go.
Now it is a juggling act. I feed the baby while he gets ready then he changes the nappy and preps the gear while I get ready. By then it is time to feed again and after all that we might actually manage to throw everything in the car, buckle baby in his car seat and leave the house.
Phew… nap anyone??
In all seriousness though, I still firmly believe that, with a bit of patience and flexibility, it is possible (and important) to still be outgoing and enjoy a life outside the four walls of home.
So here are some of the things I’ve learned about venturing out of the house with a new baby.
So my question to you is, what are your tips and tricks for getting out of the house with your little ones?
I get it. My body is amazing. It created, grew and gave birth to a human. Blah, blah, blah.
But am I a horrible, shallow person if I’m not totally wrapped about my post-miracle body? Nearly three months on and I really thought I’d at least be on track to getting back to how my body looked before. But the reflection staring back at me is still much different to what I’d like to see.
My clothes are bursting at the seams and having to ‘tuck’ my stomach into my waistband is not exactly doing wonders for my self esteem right now.
Don’t get me wrong, I really do think women’s bodies are amazing. Pregnancy and childbirth really are a miracle. But in order to be the best mum and wife I can be, I need to take care of myself and get back to liking what I see in the mirror.
I really loved being pregnant. When we were trying to have a baby I absolutely couldn’t wait for my belly to swell. I wanted to rock my baby bump and I was proud of it. I was also incredibly lucky in that I didn’t suffer from uncomfortable bloating or unsightly cankles. In fact, I actually lost weight in my first trimester. No, I wasn’t throwing up with morning sickness. I had just started a 12 week challenge before I knew I was pregnant as I had some unwanted kilos to shift following our Euro Trip where we ate and drank like kings for a month.
But then into my second and third trimesters the kilos started to stack back on. And despite saying that I wanted to have a really clean pregnancy, I ended up addicted to carbs and sugar again. I didn’t over do it to a dangerous extent but I did probably enjoy myself a little too much. I was still relatively active and was still doing high intensity weights up until the week before I gave birth.
I kind of thought that once I had the baby I would immediately drop five kilos, I’d get back to training as soon as possible and for the most part everything would return to how it was. I mean, with breastfeeding I should spring back into shape in no time right? Wrong. Breastfeeding has just made me starving ALL THE TIME!
I was eager to return to weight training but had to wait the obligatory six weeks. But as soon as I got the ok I started back again plus I have added KangaTraining and a post-partum Ultratone program to the mix.
I have slowly started to change my diet and get it back to what it was post pregnancy. But I still have a long way to go.
I am trying not to be too hard on myself and have more realistic expectations but it is difficult not to get a bit down sometimes.
Looking at my beautiful little boy it is totally worth it. But it is time to get this Mama back into shape!
For my son, for my husband, but most of all for me.
So, baby wearing is a big thing. Like, there are Facebook groups dedicated to it and everything!
And why not, it’s awesome!
I first became familiar with the concept when I was pregnant. I fell in love with Chekoh Carriers when I spotted them on social media and I couldn’t wait to get one. I really love the idea of the ‘fourth trimester’ and I thought that baby wearing was a great way to keep bub feeling safe and secure as well as being practical and super stylish with the Chekoh wraps.
It took several attempts (and about 37 views of the video) to get the hang of putting it on. And my bub was very small so it was tricky to get the tension just right. But now we (yes, Kaine loves to baby wear too!) have got it down to a fine art. Jesse loves it and so do we.
I then visited a friend while wearing the wrap and she mentioned that she uses a wrap like that when she goes out and a Baby Bjorn at home. I thought that seemed like a good arrangement and by the next day I was the proud owner of a near new one I found on Gumtree.
It certainly makes doing chores around the home much easier and the little man loves it, falling asleep almost instantly every time.
The thing is it seems that I may have developed an obsession with carrier collecting!
I went to my first KangaTraining class last week and, as the Baby Bjorn is not suitable for that, I had to borrow one of their Manducas. Well… I might just need one of those too! There are so many great options available and now Chekoh are now teasing me with their soon to be released ring slings…
Oh my, I may have a problem!
But it wasn’t until recently that I realised just how much of a big deal this baby wearing stuff is.
I went to the ‘Babes in Arms’ session at the movies to see Magic Mike XXL (I know, excellent parenting right there!) and I wore my Chekoh figuring that Jesse would sleep throughout the movie and I’d avoid the need to take a pram (which I still do use by the way). In the parents room afterwards a fellow mum asked me which wrap I was using. When I told her this prompted a several minute long conversation about wraps, carriers and baby wearing. It was fascinating. She told me about the local baby wearing community on Facebook and suggested I join my local group.
I did and was slightly freaked out at first. It’s like a exclusive society complete with secret handshake! But it appears to be an extremely supportive community and a really great way for mums to feel a part of something positive unlike so much of the ‘mummy mafia’ beahaviour out there nowadays.
So I suppose I’m officially part of the club. But, as a newbie, I’d love to hear from my fellow baby wearing enthusiasts.
What’s your favourite way to wear your Bub?
And if you haven’t tried baby wearing yet, give it a go. But beware, it’s addictive!
not so secret life of us 