I get it. My body is amazing. It created, grew and gave birth to a human. Blah, blah, blah.

But am I a horrible, shallow person if I’m not totally wrapped about my post-miracle body? Nearly three months on and I really thought I’d at least be on track to getting back to how my body looked before. But the reflection staring back at me is still much different to what I’d like to see.

My clothes are bursting at the seams and having to ‘tuck’ my stomach into my waistband is not exactly doing wonders for my self esteem right now.

Don’t get me wrong, I really do think women’s bodies are amazing. Pregnancy and childbirth really are a miracle. But in order to be the best mum and wife I can be, I need to take care of myself and get back to liking what I see in the mirror.

I really loved being pregnant. When we were trying to have a baby I absolutely couldn’t wait for my belly to swell. I wanted to rock my baby bump and I was proud of it. I was also incredibly lucky in that I didn’t suffer from uncomfortable bloating or unsightly cankles. In fact, I actually lost weight in my first trimester. No, I wasn’t throwing up with morning sickness. I had just started a 12 week challenge before I knew I was pregnant as I had some unwanted kilos to shift following our Euro Trip where we ate and drank like kings for a month.

But then into my second and third trimesters the kilos started to stack back on. And despite saying that I wanted to have a really clean pregnancy, I ended up addicted to carbs and sugar again. I didn’t over do it to a dangerous extent but I did probably enjoy myself a little too much. I was still relatively active and was still doing high intensity weights up until the week before I gave birth.

I kind of thought that once I had the baby I would immediately drop five kilos, I’d get back to training as soon as possible and for the most part everything would return to how it was. I mean, with breastfeeding I should spring back into shape in no time right? Wrong. Breastfeeding has just made me starving ALL THE TIME!

I was eager to return to weight training but had to wait the obligatory six weeks. But as soon as I got the ok I started back again plus I have added KangaTraining and a post-partum Ultratone program to the mix.

I have slowly started to change my diet and get it back to what it was post pregnancy. But I still have a long way to go.

I am trying not to be too hard on myself and have more realistic expectations but it is difficult not to get a bit down sometimes.

Looking at my beautiful little boy it is totally worth it. But it is time to get this Mama back into shape!

For my son, for my husband, but most of all for me.