Category: Love

Another Fourth Trimester: A Love Letter to My Second Son

Renee BartonLeave a comment

Where did the last three months go? Oh yes, that’s right in a blur of life with a newborn and a toddler.

As Jasper reaches 12 weeks old I can’t help feeling a tinge of sadness. I’m saying goodbye to another blissful fourth trimester spent with another gorgeous (not so) little boy. I swear I could keep doing pregnancy, birth and newborn days over and over I love it so much.


This time around was different to the first, but every bit as wonderful. Though my days were more toddler wrangling and attention dividing as apposed to ‘Netflix and Chill’ and afternoon naps, seeing Jesse’s growing affection and love for his little brother totally made up for it.


I definitely feel like I’ve slept more this time around but I could just be more accustomed to sleep deprivation nowadays. I think having a bigger baby and learning to breastfeed lying down have definitely helped.

And so as we reach this milestone I again write another love letter, this time to my second son.

To my chubba bubba Jasper,

You are such a delight, my love. Your squishy cheeks and your kissy lips melt me every day. And the way you lock eyes with me makes me feel like the luckiest mummy in the world.

No longer a newborn, but really you haven’t been one for quite some time. You outgrew your newborn nappies in less than two weeks and you have been wearing ‘crawler’ size since eight weeks old! You are already filling out 00 clothing, much of which was worn by your big brother but when he was six months old, not three!

It’s very obvious you feed well my little milk monster. And I just love how easy and calm feed time is with you.


You rushed into the world on the very day you were due. It was a beautiful, intense experience I will never forget. I will never forget our first night together when you just slept and pooped the entire night. I will never forget that you were such a noisy sleeper that mummy didn’t get a wink! And I didn’t mind one bit.


You lived in my tummy for nine months and have now been earth-side for three. Over the last three months I have loved getting to know you, cuddling and kissing you. From a noisy newborn to now, a giggling, big three month old. I could kiss your chubby cheeks all day long. And sometimes do.

Jasper James, you are such a precious addition to our family, my sweet boy.

A couple of hours after you were born I stepped into the shower with a smile on my face and whispered “I am so blessed”. And I truly am. Though some days are hard I would not have my life any other way.

Thank you ,darling, for choosing us.

Read my first fourth trimester experience here.

When the season changes…

Kaine BartonLeave a comment

A simple change of season brings with it so many things… like cool nights spent in front of the television under a blanket. Lazy mornings spent dozing under the warmth of the doona. Flannelette pyjamas. Onesies. Slow cooked meals and warm soups. Runny noses and blocked sinuses.

With a simple change of season, Winter is here.


It has brought with it, into our household at least, the kind of runny noses, blocked sinuses and chesty coughs that young children just seem to attract. It has also brought with it, restless nights.

Over the past few nights, our modest queen size bed has been full. Full with two tired parents, a sniffily, snoring toddler with a blocked nose, and a restless baby that just wants to be continuously attached to Renee’s boob. Our bed is full of warm bodies fighting for space in a forever shrinking bed that seems to be getting smaller by the minute. But it’s not just full of these sleeping, sometimes restless bodies… It is also full of love…

It is full of the love of a mother cradling her newborn in the crook of her arm as she yet again exposes her breast to the cool air of the night to once again feed, soothe and settle his tiny whimpers and cries.

It is full of the love of a newborn when he feels the warmth and closeness of his mother, as he begins to take in the sweet milk that he has been longing for.

It is full of the love of a father as he breathes in the blissful scent of his toddler’s hair when he rolls over and cuddles in for warmth, placing his tiny hand on my cheek.

It is full of the love of a toddler who feels safe wrapped in the arms of his father, as he breathes and snores softly into the night.

A simple change of season brings with it so many things. But of all the things that a change of season to those cooler months of Winter brings, it’s the overflowing feeling of love we feel as our family finally falls soundly asleep, breathing almost in harmony, cuddled up and sharing with each other our warmth, that we treasure most.

A simple change of season brings with it so many things…

And love is the greatest of them all.

Photo Friday: Not Quite Newborn

Renee BartonLeave a comment

When Jesse was just 14 days old, our amazing photographer Renee Trubai came to our home and photographed us and our little boy. She captured the rawness of us as brand new parents and all the wonder that is a brand new baby.

This time we were left to our own devices (literally) to photograph Jasper as Renee tends to her two month old twins.

We’re trying desperately not to fall into the trap of having a million photos of the first born and none of the second, but it can be tricky at times!

But 4 weeks and 4 days old, we finally got around to taking a few shots. Using our own camera, a tripod and Kaine’s iPhone (which we had to crop out of some pics!), we managed to get a few nice ones for the photo book.



This one is particularly hilarious to us because instead of looking like a delicate newborn like Jesse did, Jasper is a chunky monkey complete with arm rolls! Super cute though!

Oh yea, and Renee, we tried our hardest, but nothing compares to the photos you take. WE NEED OUR AMAZING PHOTOGRAPHER BACK!!! 😝😂

Thoughts of a Dad going back to work.

Kaine BartonLeave a comment

It’s been six weeks since I last went to work.

It’s been six weeks since I got up at 5am… put on work clothes… caught public transport… walked through Brisbane City…

But today, for the first time in six weeks, I got up at 5am, put on my work clothes, caught public transport, walked through Brisbane City and went to work. Because today, is my first day back from my planned parental leave.

For the past six weeks, I’ve had the absolute pleasure of being home with Renee to help welcome our second child, Jasper James into the world. And wow… what an amazing six weeks it’s been!

Our family grew by one (us boys now officially rule the house!!!). We had numerous visitors come through our doors to give us adult interaction but to also meet and adore our newest addition. I managed to complete a number of home projects we kept putting off because we either had no time, no money, or a combination of the two. I bonded with Jesse on a whole new level after spending almost every waking hour keeping him entertained so that Renee could tend to Jasper.

We laughed. We cried. We slept on the couch at midday because we got little sleep the night before.

We had tantrums. We had night terrors. We had snotty noses. We had vomit down out arms and nappies full of diarrhoea.

But it was literally the best six weeks at home we have spent together in a very long time.


But today, it all changed. Because today, was my first day back at work. Today, was the first day Renee was at home with both boys by herself. Today, was the day that I had to leave Renee, Jesse and Jasper at home, after spending 6 weeks with them, because I had to go back to work. Today, was one of the hardest days I’ve had to face in a long time.

I always knew it was going to be difficult leaving my family behind as I went back off to work after spending so much time together. But come yesterday evening, I felt physically sick at the thought of going back to work! Not because I hate my job, far from it! But because all I wanted to do, was to be with my family.

However, if there is one thing I do know, it’s that work is exactly where I need to be. I need to provide for my family so that there is petrol in the tank, food on the table, and nappies on the kids. I need to support my family so that Renee is able to continue to stay at home with our children and chase her passion as a Kanga Trainer.

And it’s for those reasons, as I sit here at work on my lunch break, that I know I am where I need to be, and I am okay with that.

For those of you out there who are in similar positions, remember… you may be leaving your partner and kids of a day, but don’t feel guilty about that. You are where you need to be, and in the future, they will thank you for that!

Photo Friday: Our two babies…

Renee BartonLeave a comment

Every day we are astounded at how different our boys are. We are constantly reminiscing back to when Jesse was a baby and how different Jasper is to his older brother.

Apart from their completely different colouring and features, they are also very different in size. At just 3 weeks Jasper has already come back to and surpassed is birth weight, weighing in at a monster 4.7kg. Compared to Jesse who didn’t weigh that much until he was 3 months old!

Jasper is already wearing clothes of his brothers that Jesse was wearing much later. So we decided to have a bit of fun with this.

On the left is Jesse at 9 weeks old and on the right, Jasper in the same suit at 2.5 weeks old.

No doubt we will notice many differences as they grow up but there is no denying they are already very much in love with each other.

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Welcome to the Family

Renee BartonLeave a comment

Due Date Delivery

My due date started like most days did in my last couple of weeks of pregnancy. Fairly steady contractions throughout the wee hours of the morning as I lay in bed wondering if today was the day. However unlike most days, they didn’t stop. Even once I was out of bed and going about my morning the contractions continued. Mild, but enough to know they weren’t braxton hicks and steadily increasing in intensity.

I knew the odds of babies coming on their due date was slim, but I could only hope. It was my last 24 hours to have the baby with my sister still in the country.

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Well, he must have heard my prayers because just hours later, I was holding my baby boy. Once he decided it was time there was no stopping him. My contractions were getting stronger so at about 10.45am I started timing them. At 12.15pm we headed to the hospital and at 1.32pm Jasper James entered the world.

Our First Night

I was in a state of disbelief. From feeling like I was going to be pregnant forever to giving birth all within a few hours, I was definitely shell-shocked. Blissfully happy though.

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That afternoon, Jasper met his big brother and we had some family and friends visit. And when it was time for sleep, Jasper did just that. But I was still riding the wave of adrenaline. Between that, the hospital noise and the noisiest sleeping baby in the world, mama didn’t get much sleep that night.

By lunch time the following day we were bundled up in the car and headed home. Did they really just let us lose with a baby…again??

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One week on

When there is a newborn in the house the hours and days just seem to disappear. We have spent the week hauled up at home in a beautiful little love bubble. The days lost in a blur of feeding, changing, baby gazing, visitors and of course continuing to ‘maintain’ a toddler.

Jesse has adapted exceptionally well so far. He is very gentle with his baby brother and loves to give him kisses and touch his ears. We know it’s a big adjustment for him so we are mindful to be patient and carve out special time that is all about him.

Jasper is sleeping and feeding like a champ. In fact I couldn’t believe how quickly he took to breastfeeding and how good he was at it from birth. With over a kilo on his brothers birth weight, I suppose that is a benefit of a bigger baby.

Mum and Dad are both doing well and settling into our new way of life. One week post partum and I’m feeling better each day. My labour experience was another beautiful one, albeit faster and more intense. A bit of gas and my support team got me through and there were no complications or issues (polite way of saying everything remained intact!). They weren’t wrong though when they said after-birth pains are worse with subsequent births. Ouch!!

Almost immediately after birth, the banter of a third child started and is now an ongoing joke in our household. Time will tell who wins that one…

For now we are absolutely smitten with our two gorgeous boys are feel incredibly blessed.

Photo Friday: First days at home…

Kaine BartonLeave a comment

Wow, what a whirlwind the past week as been.

And now, we have a brand new human at home that we are fully responsible for (why did the hospital let us go home?!).

The first days at home have been surreal, but also amazing, as Jasper, Jesse, Renee and I all bond and bind as a foursome instead of a threesome.

Also, I think we have the cutest baby on earth at home with us (slightly biaised opinion of course).



Hello, due date…

Renee BartonLeave a comment

I know your expected due date is not the be all and end all. It’s just a guide. And in fact only a very small percentage of babies are born on their due date.

That is why I’m so surprised to still be pregnant. 40 weeks pregnant today.

I was so sure I would have a baby in my arms by now. Partly because my first baby was born in my 38th week of pregnancy and partly because by my “period maths” my due date was actually 10 days ago.

But alas, I have no baby to hold yet. Just a huge belly, the unmistakable saunter of a heavily pregnant woman and a very sore vagina!


Going overdue doesn’t bother me per say, I have no doubt that baby will come when it’s good and ready. Despite joking that I might just be pregnant forever! But what’s starting to wear me down is the pre labour I’ve been experiencing for two weeks now. 

Yup, I’ve been having contractions on and off for two weeks. More often than not in the wee hours of the morning so losing more and more sleep with each night. As if trying to sleep at full term wasn’t uncomfortable enough!

But the growing anticipation will surely only make that first meeting even more sweet. And maybe make the labour easier to bear as I will just be so bloody glad when it actually starts for real.

In the back of my mind though is the persistent thought that today is the last chance to have this baby before my sister leaves for her amazing overseas holiday for 5 weeks. She was present at my first birth and has such an incredible relationship with Jesse. I will be terribly sad if she not only misses out on those first newborn weeks but misses meeting baby before she leaves. No doubt she will make up for it on her return. 

Ultimately though, it is out of my hands and I know that things will unfold with divine and perfect timing.

Whenever you are ready my darling…

Falling in love all over again…

Kaine Barton2 Comments

The morning started like any other morning has over the past week and a half. I slowly opened my eyes as my senses alerted me to the light of the morning sun starting to peek through the blinds and the sounds of birds chirping and early morning mowing rolled through the bedroom.

Like most mornings, I quickly came to realise that Jesse was laying in bed next to me. Rolling over to face him I began to watch his chest rising and falling with each breath. His tiny little mouth slightly open and letting out little snore like sounds. His whispy hair flicking back and forth as the fan oscillated back and forth.

Renee was still sleeping. Breathing the heavy breaths of a woman who is 39 weeks pregnant and constantly exhausted. Sleeping soundly because at that moment, she wasn’t experiencing the contractions that have kept her awake some nights.

It was peaceful. It was serene. And I didn’t want to disturb what was such a beautiful moment.

So I lay there. Awake, but as still as I could be. I lay there and found myself staring at Jesse… his eyes… his ears… his tiny little mouth and lips… his whispy blonde hair… his red, puffy cheeks… his nose…


I stared at him, wondering how we came to create such an amazing little person… How did we create this gorgeous, spirited, amazing little man that has captured our hearts so much?

I stared at him until I realised I was falling in love with him all over again.

It was almost like an out of body experience. Like I was floating above watching myself staring at this tiny little human that was silently sleeping in between us. It felt like a dream. Like it wasn’t quite real and that I needed to reach out and touch him just to make sure he was real and he was truly ours.

But I didn’t need to. Because he is real. He is ours. He is the cheeky little monkey that we have  grown to love more and more each day over the past 22 months.

And then he opened his eyes and all of a sudden, those gorgeous blue eyes were staring back at me, like he knew what I was doing all along.