Category: Funny

Photo Friday: Jesse’s First Photo with Santa

Renee Barton1 Comment

So we decided to get out and about with Jesse last night. Mostly for some Christmas shopping, but also to get the obligatory ‘baby with Santa’ shot.

And so here it is… Jesse with Santa. Looking up at him wondering who he is exactly.

Jesse and Santa

It was actually pretty cute seeing him on Santa’s knee for the first time in his life. And despite all our and the staff’s efforts to get his attention, he just wouldn’t cooperate with a smile or a glimpse in our direction.

Santa’s beard is just too interesting!

We had a bit of a chuckle about it afterwards and also thought hey, at least he wasn’t screaming in full tantrum mode like some babies in their photo with Santa.

The start of another Christmas tradition.

You Know You’re A Parent When…

Renee Barton1 Comment

There are many tell-tale signs that you have become a parent. Some are obvious. Yes, that small human being that’s constantly hanging around you now is your child. And some that may have happened subtly over time. Like the increase of toys scattered on the lounge room floor and the ever-growing dark circles under your eyes.

We have certainly noticed a lot of changes in our lives since becoming parents. And we’re only six months in!

So here’s what I’ve found.

You know you’re a parent when…

  1. Tired is the new normal. You can’t actually remember what it feels like to have a night of uninterrupted sleep. The next time you get to do it might be years away, but you know you will never take a full night sleep for granted again.
  2. There is a mini, makeshift bed on the floor next to yours. Though it may only act as a deterrent and it may only last for a few hours before they inevitably end up in your bed anyway, it’s good while it lasts.
  3. 6.30am is now considered a sleep in. What happened to those people that used to sleep in til 10am on Sunday mornings?? Now by 7am your child has kicked you in the ribs, punched you in face and pulled your hair until you gave in and got up. And by 10am you’ve managed to feed and clothe everyone, do two loads of laundry, wash up all the bottles, change clothes again due to a vomit or poop explosion, sing ‘five little Ducks’ three times and if you’re lucky, get ready to leave the house.
  4. Coffee and wine are practically food groups. Or insert other caffeinated / alcohol laden vices here.
  5. Kids shows now grace your television screen for several hours a day. And you sing along with all of the theme songs! Those things are catchy as hell and you find yourself humming them long after the show finished.
  6. Having someone else’s vomit or poop or wee or snot or dribble on you is now commonplace and no big deal.
  7. You narrate EVERYTHING all whilst referring to yourself in the third person. ‘Mummy is just going to go to the toilet and then I’ll be right back to pick you up ok?’
  8. You now talk to your spouse through baby talk with the baby. ‘Mummy thinks Daddy should go and change your nappy so Mummy can have a rest’.
  9. Your camera roll that was once filled with photos of food, travel snaps and drunken selfies is now full of photos of your kid. Often multiples of the almost exact same photo!
  10. You find yourself suddenly much more tolerant of other people’s children. That toddler throwing themselves on the ground at the shops is no longer the spectacle it once was. Instead you are just thankful it’s not your kid this time as you give the parents a knowing smile.

And, for good measure, number 11 is that despite all this you wouldn’t have it any other way. Even on the toughest days a smile, giggle or cuddle from the small human makes being a parent totally awesome.

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A friend said to me recently that of all the people she knows who have children, none of them have ever said ‘Oh, don’t do it, it’s not really worth it’.

I was oddly comforted as I realised she was right. I too have never heard any parents say it wasn’t worth it.

So while it might be bloody hard at times, anything worth doing usually is.

 

Footage Friday: Peek-A-Boo Baby

Renee Barton1 Comment

Our not-so-little-any-more Bubba will be six months old in a week. And this month especially it feels like he has grown and changed so much both physically and developmentally.

Just this past week he has grasped the concept of peek-a-boo. We stumbled across this rather accidentally.

One evening he was soundly sleeping and we were using the opportunity to do some editing. So when he woke up with a second wind he joined us in the office and we amused him while we worked.

All of a sudden he started laughing hysterically, the most gutsy laugh he has ever done, at me playing peek-a-boo with him.

For several minutes we played together, Kaine and I laughing along with Jesse and giggling to each other about how cute he was. We were just wrapped up in the game enjoying the moment but towards the end I grabbed the trusty iPhone and captured a little bit.

The quality is not great but it was just too cute not to share.

Happy Friday friends.

I HATE BABY CAR SEATS

Kaine BartonLeave a comment

So I figured out three things yesterday…

  1. I hate baby car seats!
  2. I hate installing baby car seats!
  3. I hate when I can’t finish installing a baby car seat!

Yes… These three things really ended my day yesterday in a wave of frustration and anger.

Our little Jesse was starting to outgrow his baby capsule. He has always been quite a long baby despite being a lightweight, and lately, his little legs and feet have been sticking out the end of the capsule to the point where he was able to kick the back of the seat.

Right we thought, time to upgrade the seat to something a little bigger and better.

So we packed the car, bundled up the little one and headed out for the morning to look at baby seats! We even thought that this might be a good opportunity to take the camera along and film another vlog.

Well, we did end up buying a new car seat, and a good one at that! We packed it in the boot eager to get home to install this seat that looks like the worlds comfiest chair! I mean, if they made full size versions of this thing, I’d be first in line for one!

We unpacked it, got it ready for installation and then BAM!!! It was like the capsule all over again. What is it with installing baby seats in cars that something has to inevitably go wrong!

In the end, it turned out that the tether wasn’t long enough to reach to the floor in the boot of our Outlander. “Well this is stupid!” I thought. “Why don’t they make these tethers long enough to fit all vehicles?”

We had to abandon the install in search of an extension belt for the tether. Something that, given the time it was, we wouldn’t be able to get until tomorrow.

Luckily, while I stayed at home with Jesse for the morning, Renee was able to find a tether extender, and in the end, we were able to finish the installation successfully albeit a little later than expected.

It really feels like the people in the baby stuff business are just sitting back and laughing at all of us… scheming about how they can best screw with our heads and tempers next!

I’m just glad this new seat is supposed to last Jesse until he is 4 years old. I’ll be buggered if I’m going to install another new one any time soon!!!

Our Little Giggling Baby

Kaine Barton1 Comment

So this happened yesterday…

Jesse’s first (proper) giggle.

HOW ADORABLE IS HE!!!!!!!!!!!!

So happy that we managed to get this on camera.

So how did we manage to get him to giggle? Well, Nanny and Poppy were over for lunch and to get ready for a country race day at Doomben Racecourse. Poppy decided to take him outside to play with Pacey while the girls were getting ready and sure enough, it was our dog Pacey and his barking that first made our little Jesse giggle.

Of all the things that we thought we could get Jesse to giggle at, Pacey barking is probably the last thing we thought would work. A loud bark from a dog the size of Pacey… surely that would scare a baby. Nope. Not this baby.

He loved it and thought it was absolutely hilarious.

The real test now though is to try and get him to giggle and laugh again. And despite everything that I’ve tried since discovering that he can giggle, we have still been unable to get him to giggle again.

Perseverance will surely pay off in the end.

On a side note, yesterday I also went and celebrated Tyler’s (my sisters boyfriend) 30th birthday. Happy Birthday mate… Hope you had an absolute blast of a day and I loved running the field at laser tag with you!!!

Photo Friday: Baby’s First Camping Trip

Renee Barton1 Comment

Every year in the last week of August you will find us getting our country on at the Gympie Music Muster. We have been going for over 10 years and it is definitely one of the highlights of our calendar.

This year however was a little different to most. This year we had our 3 month old baby with us.

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Yes, call us crazy, but we took Bub on his first camping trip, 5 nights in the Amamoor State Forest with 50,000 of our closest friends.

And he handled it like a champ!

What I thought was going to be an agonising car trip turned out to be a breeze. He slept the whole way there and back. And the little guy took to camping like a pro. Thunderstorm and all.

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We must say a big thank you to our awesome friends for being so understanding of our situation and for helping to make our time so enjoyable. It was incredibly reassuring to hear how happy they were that we didn’t back out because we had a baby and that it in no way negatively affected their time (no one really gets much sleep at Muster anyway).

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Obviously he is our number one priority and we made all the necessary adjustments to ensure he was safe and comfortable. But it was also great to prove that we can still do the things we love even though we are parents now.

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Footage Friday: Smiley Bubba

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We are waiting with bated breath to hear the delightful sound of Jesse’s first laugh.

He often shrieks with joy as he smiles and kicks his legs. And there have been a few times when he has smiled and had a little chuckle in his sleep but he is yet to let out a definite baby giggle.

Today’s Photo Friday is a cute video of our smiley bubba.

10 Thoughts of a Sleep Deprived Mum During Night Feeds

Renee BartonLeave a comment

I’m sure other Mum’s will agree that we can have some pretty weird and wonderful thoughts when we are awake through the night tending to our little ones.

It is a special time. The rest of the house is quiet and dark. Baby cuddles up to you and stares lovingly at you with their big blue eyes whilst guzzling their midnight snack. But its not all warm and fuzzy. Literally! It has been pretty cold in Brisbane lately, peeling back the doona is even more difficult now and don’t even mention having to get your boobs out in the cold night air! It can be downright frustrating too. When all you want to do is sleep but baby is cranky, hungry, wet, cold, hot….and its your job to figure out which of these it is so that you can both get back to sleep as soon as possible.

So, here are 10 thoughts I’m sure we’ve all have whilst fulfilling this motherly duty.

  1. My life sucks right now.
  2. Has it been 3 hours already??
  3. Shit its cold!
  4. Awww….look at my husband sound asleep completely oblivious to everything….asshole!
  5. I am the luckiest Mummy in the world….and boy do I make cute babies!
  6. My life is awesome right now.
  7. I wonder what is happening on Facebook at 3am…..hmmm, not much!
  8. Ok, please settle so we can get back to sleep now.
  9. I’m sooo bloody tired! OMG, am I ever going to sleep though the night again ever?!
  10. Great, we’re done….well at least until you wake me up again in a few hours time and we do it all again.

All jokes aside, we wouldn’t have it any other way would we mums? As we pat their backs and kiss their faces and smell their heads, we know we are the luckiest (albeit tired-est) mummies in the world.

Thoughts during the night

Mission: Leave the House for the Day

Kaine Barton1 Comment

DATE: Friday, 19 June 2015

TIME: 10:30am

THE MISSION: Leave the house (successfully) for the whole day with Jesse.

MISSION OUTCOME: SUCCESS!!!!

That was literally how it felt on Friday. It felt like we were planning a highly important military operation that needed to be carried out with precision and accuracy (yes I know those mean the same thing). Like it was almost going to be the difference between life and death if we got the planning, execution or any tiny detail of ‘Operation Escape the House for the Day’ wrong.

But… We survived.

What did we do? Well, we escaped to where every other expectant or new mothers, fathers and grandparents were going to be. At the Brisbane Pregnancy, Babies and Children’s Expo.

We packed the nappy bag, bundled Jesse into his carrier and loaded the car in preparation for the day trip to baby central (the Expo). As we drove out of the garage and down the driveway, I turned to Renee and said “Are you sure we have everything?”

“YES! It’ll be fine.” She responded.

Ok great, so I should just ignore this feeling of dread that’s washing over me in waves right now?

We pull into the carpark of the Brisbane Convention and Exhibition Centre and find a car space relatively easily. We grab Jesse and his carrier, load the pram up and start toward the Expo.

As we poke our heads through the doors, all I can see is prams, babies and pregnant women everywhere. There is no order, there is no structure, there’s just prams and kids and people going in every direction. Its absolute chaos, like sperm swimming around trying to find their way to the ultimate prize, which is ironic considering that’s how everyone in the hall got into this mess in the first place.

First port of call, food for us. The café is down the back of the hall. Ok let’s do this.

WATCH OUT FOR THAT PRAM!

Stop, rogue child.

Quick, let’s make a break, there’s no one in front.

No wait, another pram, hard right… HARD RIGHT!

Ok, let’s try left.

Nope, left is no good. I repeat, left is no good.

We need to make a U turn. Checking left, checking right, GO.

Ok, we made it!

Expo Shot

After refuelling, we were ready play dodgem cars with the other prams and headed out to look at the stalls. Who knew babies needed so much stuff! Or do they?

There were the typical stalls you would expect to see at a pregnancy and baby expo like newborn photographers, prams and prams and more prams and popular brands like Curash, S-26 and Phillips Avent. There was also this great stall full of Rugby League onesies including a Brisbane Broncos and Queensland Marrons onesies. We managed to resist the temptation.

However, what really caught our attention was all the weird gadgets, contraptions and furniture on offer. Like the stall offering a devise for parents to suck snot out of their babies noses. Or the stall that had the ‘Baby Shoosher’, which was essentially a plastic speaker that repeatedly played a ‘ssssshhhhhh’ sound over and over again. How much is it? REALLY?

Then there were the stalls with furniture for babies that looked like it had come straight of the set of ‘The Jetsons’. I don’t think interior decorating has quite embraced the space age look just yet.

Before anyone gets upset and claims that the Baby Shoosher is the greatest thing since sliced bread, I have written this in jest. By all accounts the stall offering the Baby Shoosher did claim it had an 80% success rate, although I’m sure parents making the ‘ssssshhhhh’ sounds themselves would have a similar effect.

At the end of the day, we did manage to escape the Expo unscathed without spending too much money. The only purchase we made on the day was a nappy (diaper) disposal bin for Jesse’s nursery. Some of you might claim that this is also not really needed, and you’re probably right. But we like it for the convenience factor.

It actually was a pretty great day and the perfect way to spend our first full day out of the house. Mixing with other parents and expectant mothers.

I have a feeling that I will probably be less stressed the next time we prepare for a full day out of the house.