Our cheeky little monkey has decided lately that early mornings are a great time to smile and giggle and keep Mummy awake.
But with a face this cute how could I possibly get mad.
Tag: First Time Mum
The Mum Version Of Me
They say becoming a parent changes you. And it does.
I mean I’m still me, just the mum version of me. There’s the obvious stuff like the dirty nappies, permanent vomit on the shoulder and baby paraphernalia taking over the lounge room.
But I wasn’t ready for how every sad news story now affects me at my deepest level. Every house fire, every car accident. I can’t help but think what if that was my child, my baby.
A missing little boy makes me hug mine a little tighter. A sick child makes me pray for mine a little harder. Three little babies being left behind at a hospital because their mum can’t afford them or cope with the realities of triplets brings tears to my eyes.
When you’re a parent, the need to protect your cub is sometimes overwhelming. You know there will be skinned knees and broken arms and broken hearts in the future but you can’t help but want to protect them from all the bad things.
A little rash, a scratch on the face from a tiny sharp fingernail or a sniffly nose is enough to bring on a bout of guilt and a tug at the heart strings.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a crazy mum who worries about everything and I don’t want to be the mum that wraps her kid in cotton wool. Kids will be kids and often learn through a little bump to the head or a tumble over clumsy feet, but I absolutely have a new found respect for any parent who has had to experience a sick child or worse.
If this is you, my hat goes off to you and my daily prayers now include you.
Footage Friday: Mum and Dads Day Off
So a couple of weekends ago, we kind of tagged teamed our parenting responsibilities on the Saturday so that we could both go out and enjoy ourselves. It guess you could call it, ‘Mum and Dads Day Off’.
We decided to do a video blog on the day, but until only recently, all the footage remained on our hard drive as an unedited project. Well, I finally got around to editing it, so we can finally share what we got up to on the day…
After all, this is called the ‘Not So Secret Life Of Us’!
Renee had the morning shift with Jesse so that I could go out to celebrate the 30th Birthday of my sister’s boyfriend. He had schedule a bunch of us (about 20) to play Laser Tag at Mango Hill Skirmish.
It was an absolute blast and was even a great workout, running around the course in camouflage and with a heavy Laser Tag gun.
I got home just after lunch to take the afternoon shift with Jesse so that Renee could head to a country music themed race day at Doomben Racecourse. She also had a blast, having the afternoon and evening off and being able to indulge in a few beers too.
We capped the night off with some finals football (Rugby League) at home and were all tucked up and in bed all before the stroke of midnight.
All in all, it was a pretty successful day of fun I think…
365 Project: 100+ Days In
So I know I’ve touched on this before… but wow… we are now up to day 116 of our 365 Project! How insane is that!!!
I cannot believe that we have made it this far…
A photo every day.
A post every day.
All showing off what our lives are like as a first time mum and dad.
The 365 Project has been many things… challenging… tough… fun… exciting… hard… easy…
Having to come up with a photo and post EVERY DAY has been challenging at times… but we knew that we were not going to be in for an easy ride with this project.
All that said though, we are having an absolute blast doing it.
Looking back on all the photos I’ve taken, all I can think about is the end game. The end result. That book that we will end up with that shows what our lives were like in that first year with our little Jesse.
How amazing is that going to be to share with friends and family! How amazing will that be to share with other first time mums and dads out there to show them hey, you aren’t the only ones who have felt like this or gone through that. You aren’t alone. We’ve all been there. And we will all be better off for it!
But the best thing of all, how amazing is it going to be to share this book with Jesse when he is older! How amazing is it going to be for Jesse to be able to read all about his first year of life through our eyes as first time parents.
All the ups and downs… the trials and tribulations… the struggles and the victories… How much our lives changed but also how we wouldn’t have had it any other way…
While I don’t want to wish the year away, I cannot wait to see this book in all its glory at the end of this project!
The 365 Project continues…
Babies and Capsules and Car Trips….Oh My!
The day we brought Jesse home from hospital was a magical day.
After spending those first few days cooped up within hospital walls trying to figure everything out it was an incredible feeling to finally be leaving with our beautiful bundle. The sun was shining and we were both grinning from ear to ear. And our gorgeous, tiny baby boy was snug in his carrier in the back seat of the car and didn’t make a sound the whole way home.
Over those first few weeks when we managed to venture out of the house we were so proud of ourselves, it all seemed so easy with a newborn.
But something is different. Something has changed.
I now feel dread every time I even think about having to put the boy in his car seat and drive somewhere.
Nothing raises the blood pressure quicker or the stress levels faster than being in a car with a screaming, petrified 3 month old.
Oh yes, those days of a tiny, sleeping newborn in the back seat are over and now it is like we have an entirely different child.
And I have tried everything. Talking to him in soft, soothing tones, playing relaxation music, playing classical music for babies (which by the way sounds god-awful and only adds to the stress), playing motivational audios, singing to him, giving him toys – nothing has worked!
Our car trips as a family have resulted in one of us sitting in the back with him, dummy and bottle at the ready. Which seems to work well. He even drifts off to sleep a lot of the time. But when it is just me… a 15 minute car trip is suddenly my worst nightmare.
I thought babies love going in the car. It puts them to sleep right? Wrong! Well not ours anyway. I guess I should consider myself lucky in that I don’t need to drive my kid around the block at 3am because its the only way to get him to sleep.
As frustrating as it is I really can’t blame the poor little guy. He’s scared. It is dark back there, he is strapped down at an awkward angle and though he can hear mummy he can’t see her.
When I swoop in to rescue him he has worked himself up into a hot sweat and the look of sheer terror on his face breaks my heart. I undo the seatbelt as quickly as I can and hold him close whispering reassuring words into his little ears.
I can only imagine how scared he feels back there but boy, I really hope this phase ends… soon!
One remedy I have heard of is printing out a giant photo of mum’s face and sticking it up where baby can see it.
So if you happen to walk past a car in the car park and see a woman’s big smiling face taped to back seat, it’s me. A desperate mother willing to try anything to stop her baby screaming his lungs out in the car.
If you have any other ideas or if you too have a baby crying uncontrollably in your back seat, let me know I’m not alone. Please.
Don’t let the smile fool you.
Monthly Milestones: 3 Months
Babies grow and change so quickly and ours is no exception.
So we decided it might be fun to record a video each month to create a snapshot in time that we can look back on in the future.
An opportunity to capture the milestones he reached that month, funny stories, his likes and dislikes and our thoughts and feelings as parents at each stage.
This is the first instalment.
Photo Friday: Baby’s First Camping Trip
Every year in the last week of August you will find us getting our country on at the Gympie Music Muster. We have been going for over 10 years and it is definitely one of the highlights of our calendar.
This year however was a little different to most. This year we had our 3 month old baby with us.
Yes, call us crazy, but we took Bub on his first camping trip, 5 nights in the Amamoor State Forest with 50,000 of our closest friends.
And he handled it like a champ!
What I thought was going to be an agonising car trip turned out to be a breeze. He slept the whole way there and back. And the little guy took to camping like a pro. Thunderstorm and all.
We must say a big thank you to our awesome friends for being so understanding of our situation and for helping to make our time so enjoyable. It was incredibly reassuring to hear how happy they were that we didn’t back out because we had a baby and that it in no way negatively affected their time (no one really gets much sleep at Muster anyway).
Obviously he is our number one priority and we made all the necessary adjustments to ensure he was safe and comfortable. But it was also great to prove that we can still do the things we love even though we are parents now.
I Think You Are A Super Mum
Last Sunday night was another rough night for Renee as far as sleep goes.
Unfortunately for us (although I’m sure Jesse loved it), our little man had a massive sleep that afternoon while we were at a family BBQ. This meant that when it came time for us to get some sleep, he was any combination of wide awake; restless; feeding; smiling; crying.
This made for a very frustrating start to what I expected to be a long night ahead for Renee.
We have a system for night times which seems to work for us most of the time. That system involves Renee getting up throughout the night to tend to Jesse (she does have the boobs after all) so that I can get a good night sleep for work the next day, and me tending to Jesse (again, when he’s not hungry and wanting to feed on account of having no boobs) when I get home and on the weekends.
This does mean however, as you would have read in Renee’s last blog post, that she hasn’t had a full nights sleep since Jesse was born.
I know she had a rough night on that Sunday night, and the next day I really wanted to let her know that she could call on me if she was at wits end and just needed a break or some sleep.
At around 10 am on Monday morning, I sent the following text message:
“Hey babe. So are you sure you’re ok today?
I just really want to stress to you that while I do appreciate how you want to make sure I get enough sleep for work, I would rather be sleepy at work for a day than have you up losing your shit at night with Jesse.
I think you’re an absolute star and a super mum, but if you’re struggling and at wits end, I am here. I WANT to help. You don’t have to do it all by yourself. That’s my role and responsibility as a dad!
Love you.”
I received a text message back minutes later telling how much just some simple words like that really meant. She went on further to say:
“You are such a great dad. In fact, everyone says what a great dad you are. I dont often get told that I am doing a good job so thank you for saying that.”
So I am here today, writing this down, to tell you that you are not just doing a good job… you are doing a phenomenal job as a new mum to our little Jesse.
I know you don’t hear it enough. From me or from others. And for that I am sorry.
But I am here, now, telling you that to me, you are Superwoman! And I promise to remember to tell you more often, just how good of a job you are doing!
You are our super mum!
The Big Sleep Obsession
When you become a parent, in particular a mum, you become incredibly aware of sleep.
You are either doing it, wishing you were doing it, thinking about doing it or talking about doing it.
Everything is now being weighed up against sleep.
Housework or sleep?
Exercise or sleep?
Sex or sleep?
Sleep will usually trump just about everything else. But often you just want to get some things done or simply enjoy a few minutes to yourself to just lie on the couch and stare stupidly into space (there’s not enough brain power to read all those books I thought I’d catch up on during my maternity leave!).
Watching your baby sleep is both delightful and frustrating. It’s 7.30 pm and he is sleeping. I should really go to bed too. But then BAM… suddenly it’s 9 pm and he’s awake and hungry. Or worse, happy and wanting to play! Damn it, was it really worth staying awake to watch some crappy TV show or do the dishes? I could have had an hours’ sleep!
I’ve now gone 3 months without a solid nights sleep. And I definitely underestimated the concept of sleep deprivation. The last night I slept through was the 25th May. And had I have known it would be my last I would have taken notice and really took pleasure in it.
But that is just life with a baby right. I always knew that would be the case. I’ve missed the odd night of sleep due to a big night of partying and I survived that fine. This will be a piece of cake. No ‘job’ to get up for so I’ll just go with the flow and sleep when I can…
Well that’s all well and good in theory but I’ve come to realise it is really f#*%ing annoying to be woken up 3 times a night, our bodies are not built to do that. And you go through your days with a foggy brain which only gets worse. Some days I really wonder if I should be operating a vehicle!
Other people are now suddenly obsessed with mine and my babies sleep habits too. Any conversation usually includes “so is he a good sleeper?”
My answer is always yes. But what does that even mean? I say yes because at least I’m getting some sleep. Two hour blocks has now increased to 3-4 hour blocks most nights. And when I get 5 in a row I feel like a new woman!
Then comes the obsession with the elusive ‘sleeping through’ phenomenon. When is my baby going to do it? Her baby is two months younger and is already doing it. Am I ever going to sleep like a normal person (aka my husband) again?
For the most part of the last 3 months we have co-slept. Not something I thought I would do but worked for us and has kept us sane. But I’m now ready to reclaim our bed and sleep comfortably again.
Jesse is not a fan of the bassinet so it looks as though we are going to attempt to move him straight to his cot in his own room. Eek!
Wish us luck!
What are your tips for getting baby to sleep on their own or moving to their cot?
Photo Friday: Baby Discovers His Hand
One of the most thrilling parts of having a new baby is watching them grow, learn and discover.
Mr Jesse has recently discovered his fist….well the left one at least. Several times a day when his hand passes his face he gets fixated on it for minutes. Staring and studying it with immense fascination.
It is such a joy to watch him discovering his body and the world around him. We look forward to seeing him learn to roll, sit up and all the other precious milestones that are no doubt just around the corner.
What are your favourite milestones to watch your baby achieving?
not so secret life of us 